It can be hard to find the right words during this time, and it’s one of the most emotional parts of the funeral. It can be a difficult task; how do you even begin to summarise the life of the one you loved into a short speech? It’s not easy, but these top tips might just help you along the way to writing the perfect eulogy…
Tell a story
Storytelling is a powerful and beautiful way to remember your loved one. Reflect on your favourite memories together, and select the standout one that you can share with their friends and family. An engaging story will be appreciated by all, but try to keep it to no longer than five minutes. You’ll never be able to share everything, so pick out key moments and enjoy reminiscing.
Perfect your tone
Tone is a tricky one, and it’s largely dependent on who you’re saying goodbye to. You don’t want your eulogy to come across as too light-hearted an insincere, but you also shouldn’t be afraid to add humour. People will enjoy hearing your funny stories and funerals shouldn’t be all doom and gloom. They should be a chance to celebrate the individual’s life, and all of the funny and memorable moments. It goes without saying but try to keep it PG and refrain from any inappropriate stories or language.
Practice with someone
It’s natural to feel nervous and apprehensive about giving a speech in front of a crowd of people, especially during such an emotionally challenging time. In can be extremely beneficial to practice with a friend or family member, this will help you to feel more confident when delivering your eulogy at the funeral, particularly if you struggle with public speaking which many of us do. Practising with someone close to you may also spark an idea or memory, or they might offer you helpful criticism. Don’t be offended if they suggest changes to your speech, adapt and put yourself in the mind of your audience.
There’s little point in trying to memorise your speech without paper, sure, you may be able to recite it from start to finish now but you’ll be in a very different mental state on the day of the funeral. You may want to print and laminate your eulogy so you can keep hold of it afterwards, printing copies off for friends and family is also a nice touch. Alongside your written copy, be sure to bring a bottle of water in case your throat dries up, and a handkerchief for the inevitable tears.
Writing a eulogy and planning a funeral is no easy task, it can be stressful and overwhelming. If you’re struggling, reach out to the experts at Beyond who can help you with everything from finding a funeral director to getting help with funeral costs. Don’t struggle on your own, help is out there so don’t be afraid to reach out.