A Guide For Manic Mum Days by George R Vaughan

Allison Mitchell

As a parent myself I have always known how difficult it can be to bring up a family as well as trying to hold down a job, so whilst perusing my local book store recently, I was drawn towards a title that was simply crying out for me to take notice. Time Management for Manic Mums does exactly what it says on the cover and after a casual flick through, I felt there was a lot I could learn (even as a man) from its author, Alison Mitchell. They say that first impressions count and if that’s the case then there is little doubt that my first 15 minutes with Alison revealed a gregarious and enthusiastic woman who really had some sensible advice to give to those willing to listen. “For pretty much all of my working life I’ve been involved in a career focused around people and human development. Alongside this I have also been a wife and mother. They say you should write about what you know so that’s exactly what I did! Alison’s success has been a process of hard work and commitment and also about never losing sight of what it is she set out to do. “I’ve been lucky in that I’ve always done what I wanted to do and even in the early stages of my working life I was fortunate enough to have been in the right place at the right time. Yes, working hard is a necessary component of any success you have but you also need a fair bit of luck as well if you are going to make it.” Alison started life at Anderson Consulting in the UK and quickly became interested in training people. From here she enrolled herself on a series of courses that garnered her qualifications in areas such as International Management Training and Self Management. Acquiring these skills allowed her to coach people within the business environment right across the board, from junior to the most senior members of staff. “”People development” is a very important part of any successful company and when an organisation puts investment in an individual it immediately makes that person feel more valued. Industry needs to realise that the cogs which make their businesses turn are these individuals and in the 21st century they have to work a lot harder to keep quality staff members. “Everything I learned here I took with me into the next phase of my career. My decision to move into offering advice to mothers really happened by chance and I have to thank my children – at least in part – for the inspiration behind this deviation in direction. “It happened one morning. I was in the midst of an argument with my 7 year old which was proving both frustrating and unrewarding. I suddenly took a step back and said to myself: here I am a paid trainer and yet I can’t even speak to my own children. Surely I’m not the only person in this situation. Surely there are other mothers out there like me?” It was at this moment that Alison saw her chance and she grasped it with both hands. “I think it’s fair to say that women - and mums in particular - are an undervalued group in modern society. There’s plenty of evidence to suggest that many mothers feel like they are treated differently and whilst part of the problem may lie in the mind of the mother, business needs to be more understanding in its approach. “When I decided to go back to work after my children were born, Acenture, the company I was working for at the time, completely redesigned my job so that I could work 3 days a week. Consequently, I believe that more and more businesses need to start thinking “outside of the box” when it comes to accommodating this very important element of the workforce. “Advancements in technology mean that work is no longer about being sat in front of a desk; for anyone who is office bound their work is now portable. A laptop and a broadband connection mean you can pretty much operate anywhere! With this new freedom so a whole host of boundaries collapse and immediately liberate employees.” However, it isn’t just female employees that need the culture to change. Research supports the theory that more women are moving into the business arena, creating what has now been affectionately dubbed by the media as “Kitchen Table Tycoons”. “I think that one of the major hurdles for women with children is overcoming the guilt. For the first six months you do nothing but focus all your energy and attention into this tiny bundle of joy and then suddenly it’s back to work and within days your goals are split and it becomes hard to re-adopt the business role when you’re constantly thinking about the baby you’ve left at home.” All of which brought me back to the main subject of the interview and Alison’s book, Time Management for Manic Mums. Leafing through the accessible and clearly written volume you never feel you are being spoken down to or pushed into a system of belief. Alison has laid out everything clearly and concisely and in some respects it’s almost as if you are sharing the first hand experiences and making the journey towards better time management with her yourself. “I didn’t sit down and think “I need to write a book: how about I tell people with children how to organise their lives”. It didn’t work like that. I actually got to the point where I felt my time never seemed to be my own and the day was over before it has even started and I didn’t want to carry on like that. Being a mother doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice who you are as a person and you still need time for yourself.” “Naturally there are elements of the book which are never going to meet everyone’s aspirations but fundamentally we are all the same. “No matter what your religion or race, culture or creed, being a mother - wherever you are in the world - is still being a mother. You can’t teach someone that process. It’s natural and even in the absence of any kind of guidance any woman with children will grow into the role.” Since its release the book has received rave reviews and been serialised in a national British newspaper. “I think I’ve tapped into something that people can really relate to. I’ve been inundated by requests and interest which is very satisfying. It makes me feel that I’ve done something worthwhile. Added to this, my husband and children are impressed and all of them like the book. The younger ones especially enjoy the poems and I recently went into school to talk about my experiences writing it.” So, what about the book then? Well, interestingly enough Alison believes that most children and adults fall within one of four broad categories: owls, elephants, lions and monkeys. Owls represent order, elephants are the relaxed bunch of the group and like to take their time whilst lions are challenging and more competitive and monkeys make up the group as the sociable jokers. Identifying which animal you and your children fall under may not come as easily as Alison suggests but once you do find your “beast of choice” everything about her theories suddenly slots into place and makes a lot of sense. However, I wondered if Alison’s methods were more suited to the traditional family – mum, dad and 2.4 children – and might not have the same resonance amongst single parent households but she told me that her system worked just as well, if not better with women bringing up children alone. “Single-parents often have the hardest job of all and the plan I lay out in my book probably has an even greater relevance to them since they often don’t have anyone else to fall back on.” Not content with sitting on her laurels, Alison already has plans for the future with further books to come and the possible link to a television show already in the pipeline. “I’m a person who doesn’t believe in standing still. I think we should all make the most of our lives because in truth it’s a very short stay we have on the planet and I for one don’t want to look back one day and feel I’ve wasted a single moment.” For more information on Alison’s work check out her website at www.mumsanddads.com George R Vaughan